I am (not) beautiful

anymore. I used to be, but not anymore.

Now I am fat, just just chubby or fluffy but full on Roly Poly Olie! I hate myself like this, I don't feel like me anymore. I feel like I should just except it that my youth is over and this fat is going to kill me eventually. Its winning the war, I may win a battle or two but ultimately I am LOSING. Even if I do lose all this weight (100 lbs!!) my skin is going to be all saggy and droopy even worse than it was before. I have terrible acne now, I always had beautiful skin before. I feel like its hopeless. This is me now, the gigantic Quinn next to her small girlfriend and tiny friend!



Look at me in this picture here, people say I was TOO thin here but I almost glow happiness.


So thats that. I am 27 years old and I feel like my life is over. I am not depressed, I am just facing reality here. I don't have the time in my life to concentrate on me,I'm not sure I ever will at least not for the next 15-20 years or so. I don't have the money either. What I do have is six kids, a beautiful partner, and a Budda Belly that is so round my pants wont stay up on it. My beautiful waistline that I always had even after BIRTH is long gone. Such is life. My goal for tomorrow is walking up the stairs without panting.... yet another battle lost before its even started. Damn Pneumonia!